An Open Letter to My Daughter

Dear Z,

How time flies! It was only yesterday when I first heard your cry and now you are running around the house and causing so much trouble. My dear baby you're now a toddler!

I remember so well how anxious I was in November 2014 when I had bleeding and was unsure if I was really pregnant with you. My head was telling me that I was having my period but my heart knew there was a person in my womb - you.

I was scared that I may not be able to love you as much as your Kuya and that I carried that burden in the early months of my pregnancy. I thought I can never love another baby. But I was so wrong.

Then you were born.

I didn't know my heart could carry so much love for my two kids. I then understood that a mother's love has no boundaries - whether she has an only child or a dozen. That a mother loves unconditionally. That she'd be able to love all her children equally. I've felt it and I love having you and your Kuya. You both are our treasures.

We share a special bond, my Pretty. There are so many new things I've done with you that made our journey special.

When I was pregnant with you, I wrote several ideas I'd like to do differently in raising you. More than a year later, I am proud to have accomplished them. And like any parent, I read, review, apply, and assess if a particular way of raising you would be applicable for us. You are unique, different from your Kuya and other kids, so I know that the way to raise you would be different. Rest assured, my love, that whatever Mama and Papa are doing is what we think are best for you.

You're a great partner, Pretty. 

You've been exclusively breastfed since Day 1. I was still on the operating table when we had our First Yakap. I was so determined to breastfeed you that I did my best educating myself about breastfeeding. I am elated that we were able to successfully breastfeed. As how the breastfeeding counsellor at Medical City puts it, "Galing ni baby."

I am thankful for social media and other mom bloggers, I learned a lot too about cloth diapering and babywearing. Quite frankly, I try my best not to view the Facebook groups of these advocacies because I'm afraid I'd be purchasing another carrier or cloth diaper. Ha! Ha!  Magastos, anak! Good thing your Mama has a very tight budget so I don't get to buy stuffs impulsively.

You're one strong person.

You fought when you were in my womb. You held your place while I was bleeding.

You managed your growth to normal when I had gestational diabetes.

You positioned yourself well to remove me from a condition called placenta previa.

Thank you baby, for helping us to have a healthy pregnancy.

And thank God for making you a healthy, active, and happy baby.

You look for ways to get what you want.

We can already see your ugali when you were just a month old. Yes, that young. You were (and still are) vocal to what you want and won't settle for less. It drives me crazy sometimes but I always try to remind myself that you're just being you - a bright and strong young lady who knows what she wants and would do her best to get things done. But please, stop putting everything in your mouth. And give me some space in our bed, ang liit liit mo pero sinasakop mo buong bed naten.

You're a great imitator.

Your Papa and I are amazed of the things you can do at such a young age. You like to imitate your Kuya, even joined to kick with the rest of his Taekwondo class, and you were just 9 months old then. You (try to) do most of the things your Kuya does - run, kick, climb, play with cars, jump.. Your Kuya is your idol. And Your Kuya loves you to the moon and back. He said he loves you the most; your Papa and I aren't complaining.

You're a happy child.

We love your smile. You're always smiling and playful. And we enjoy every time you kiss us and make a sound "Ba" instead of mwah. Don't change, sweetie. Be the sweet little angel that you are.

As I write this with you sleeping by my side, I can't help but shed tears of joy because you are living up to your names which mean "lively" and "blessing." You are indeed a blessing in our lives. You shine so bright, our dear Little Miss Sunshine.

Shine bright like the sun.

We love you so much.

Happy birthday, Pretty Zoe!